Regular readers of this here blog (hi mum) will be familiar with what came to be known as ' the little devils'. Well, you will be glad to hear that the devils have returned, only this time they're bigger, older and more menacing than before. That's right, I have a group of teenagers which torment me and cause me no end of stress.... now known as the 'big rascals'. There's seven of them... imagine if you will, seven Kevin the Teenagers, all sitting together in a row with nothing but ME as the target of all their teenage angst and hatred of learning.

For your amusement:

Me: So, here on our practise exam, Part 2 'Speaking' it says you have to speak for 15 minutes with the examiner about this topic – 'Teenagers are lazy'. Student X, tell me what you think.
Kevin the Teenager 1 : Teenagers are lazy, most of them.
Me: Why do you think that?
KTT1: Because they do nothing.
Me: Ok does anyone agree?
****silence*****
Me: Does anyone disagree?
****silence*****
Me: Student Y, do you agree or disagree?
KTT2: I agree.
Me: Why?
KTT2: Because of what he said.
Me: Can you be more specific?
KTT3: Teenagers watch tv and surf the internet.
Me: So is surfing the internet lazy?
KTT1: Yes.
Me: Why?
KTT1: They sit and don't move.
Me: So you define lazy by not moving? What about reading a book, is that lazy?
KTT1: No....

..... and so it goes on, for an hour and a half which, by the way, isn't actually 90 minutes because on Thursdays at 5.45pm I enter a black hole in which time stands still. I told you things would get a bit 'Stephen King' as the winter sets in.... I'm living in a town where the teenagers have been replaced with zombies.....all I need to do now is start that novel about a person writing a novel who works as an English teacher in a school inhabited by the living dead. Hang on a minute....